You Don't Need The Sun To Make You Shine

A comeback….

is in the works.

Asshole.

Thank you for ruining my first day back to school with your attitude and fighting with me. I understand you’re stressed but I’m doing everything I can to help you. Don’t treat me like shit. I don’t deserve that I do too much for you to ever be treated badly.

i am happy.

I got my best friend back tonight.

Angeala and I were best friends in high school, we were inseparable. We did everything together, we worked together, we talked about everything, we were rarely apart. We stopped talking about 2 years ago after she had gone away to college. We weren’t together anymore, she didn’t like my boyfriend, we just started to drift until we didn’t talk at all. When she came back we were just acquaintances, co-workers, nothing more. As time past we got better and talked more and really got along but it was only at work, outside there was nothing.

Tonight I spent 4 hours with this girl. We sat in Chili’s until they were empty and then we stood in the cold for almost an hour. We just talked and caught up more and laughed. It was like high school again. It was like nothing ever came between us.

I can’t even say how happy I am right now. I’ve missed this girl like crazy, I’ve missed our times together, I’ve missed our friendship. And now I have her back, my best friend, the girl who has been like my sister. We’re back.

And now I have a deadline to meet, by March 3rd. I need to grow some balls and just do it!

90s Nickelodeon

I’m so loving that 90s Nickelodeon is back, even if it is after midnight

Having these shows back just completes my life, nothing on tv will ever be as good as 90s cartoons

btw I’m now following like 5 90s tumblrs, send me more?!?!?

loving my entire dash being 90s and cats

:D

today was just perfect

we went go-karting, had dinner, then came home to amazing sex, a really good movie, and some more amazing sex :D

i love my boyfriend

i can’t wait to go on vacation with just him to arizona for 11 days!! :D

but for now, i’m so fucking burnt

goodnight :)

I don’t mean to disappoint anyone, but I really do feel like this is my best option right now. I’m so proud of myself for coming out and calmly telling you my decision, I just wish I felt more relieved knowing that I got what I wanted and what I need. I guess it will just take a bit to sink in.

okay well I’ve made a decision. I am not going back to school next semester. I am taking some time off and taking a break. I need to figure out what I really want to do with my life (I was going for human services but am not sure about that anymore) and I need to get more motivation.

Directly after high school I went to our local community college (which I am proud of because it really is an awesome school), I’ve been there for 2 years now. I’ve failed or gotten a grade below graduation standards in at least 1-2 classes every semester. I’m not a good student. I have no motivation. I don’t want to be in school anymore. I don’t want to do the work (I enjoy going to most classes I just don’t enjoy and usually just don’t do the work). I have been put on academic probation for next semester and because I know I have no motivation and don’t want to do the work and that it most likely will not get any better next semester, I’m leaving now before I get kicked out so I can return later on.

I’m sure most people don’t think this is such a big decision and shouldn’t be so stressful, but with my family it is. I’m the last child and I’ve always had so many high expectations and so much pressure put on me when it’s come to school (or rowing or really anything else i’ve done). So telling my mom this decision wasn’t very easy, even though it did go a lot smoother that I thought it would. She told me she’s disappointed. Shit that sucks to be told that by a parent. But after the tears started flowing she said she wasn’t disappointed in me as a person but disappointed that I failed her high expectations and disappointed in my lack of motivation and responsibility. It still sucked hearing that. But she is right. I’m disappointed in myself too. I wish I had done better and took school more seriously. But I didn’t, I fucked up. But now I’m trying to fix it.

I’ve promised her and myself that I will go back to school. But I need a break right now. I need to relax and enjoy my time and do what I want and what makes me happy. I need to learn how to manage my time better. And mostly I need to find what I want to do with my life and get the motivation to do it. I don’t know how long this is going to take, but I will go back to school. I want to have a good life and be able to give my family a good life.

Another thing that came out of this: I stood up to my mom and told her, for the first time, that this is what I want to do and I’m going to do it. I’m such a wuss when it comes to standing up to my parents or even just doing something different that they might not like. I’m so proud of myself for this.

I wish you’d love me like you used to.

I love doing arts and crafts at 1 in the morning when I should be studying for a final tomorrow.

I made a bag out of an old t-shirt! OMG I love it! It looks so great!

This is where I found out how! It’s so simple and fast! Seriously worth a try :)

No-Sew Recycled T-Shirt Bag!

Maybe I’ll post a picture of mine soon :)